Stupid Shit You Did As A Kid

youw-anchor:

phototaxis:

"Tell me all the bad words you know. Go."

YES

netflixkilledme:

conquerorwurm:

gianteldritchspaceworm:

LOOK AT THIS BABY

LOOK AT HER

LOOK

 

what the fuck she is conducting along she is like zero and a half years old come on  

teamdraco:

pleatedjeans:

Kids Say the Darndest Things (24 Pics)

I JUST LEARNED THE F WORD IT IS FUCK

DEAR DIARY BICH.

when I was a kid I had one of those life sized Barbie dolls and for some reason I was obsessed with the idea of like putting human organs into it (like brain, heart, blood, kidneys, etc whatever it would need to be alive) and making it into basically a living human in a plastic shell that could talk and walk around. I think I even dreamt about it a couple times. so yeah that was kind of fucked up.
Anonymous
When I was young, my favorite movie was the Wizard of Oz. I absolutely loved the Munchkins! I was about 5 and was in the grocery store with my mom when I saw a person with dwarfism. I then exclaimed "Look, she's from the Wizard of Oz!"
Anonymous

alfronaut:

when i was 7 my friend had a tamagotchi and i was so jealous because she paid more attention to it than she did to me so i arranged to have a sleepover and once she fell asleep i hid the tamagotchi under her bed and by the time she found it again it had DIED im a murderer

Puppy Underwear

So, when I was a kid,I had briefs with little puppies on it. Being a wanna be punk in those days, puppies were not in. So I lit them on fire in the cranky neighbors yard. I ran away with my leather jacket and spiked hair. This lead to a neighborhood search. But everyone thought it was the neighbor’s son. SO NOBODY KNOWS I DID IT!

So, when I was a kid, I had to use the bathroom. In the classroom, because they didn’t want kids to go to the wrong one. So anyway, I had to make a huge dump, and my teacher told me to get out since it was a fire drill. I pulled up my underwear but not my pants. This resulted in being laughed at except by ummm, let’s see here…. Nobody. This is how I became goth.

So, when I was a kid, I had to use the bathroom. In the classroom, because they didn’t want kids to go to the wrong one. So anyway, I had to make a huge dump, and my teacher told me to get out since it was a fire drill. I pulled up my underwear but not my pants. This resulted in being laughed at except by ummm, let’s see here…. Nobody. This is how I became goth.

psychoticallysweet:

penceyprepofficial:

when I was like 9 my neighbors asked me to watch their fish and cat while they went on vacation and I was like “lol k” and while they were gone tHE FUCKING FISH DIED so when they got home I apologized to the mom and she was just like “no need to apologize, I turned the filter off so they would die because they are too much work. You did nothing wrong” and she gave me 20 bucks and that is the story of my first contracted murder

first

My writing attempt

So, my mother thought I needed some improvement with my writing, so she let me write a story on how to do something. I wrote a story on how to explode a toilet. Using garlic, cake, a clock, Coldplay CDs, and a bomb. I was six though.